Christmas List

Wow. It's December 1st already. Hard to believe 2011 is one month away from ending. Christmas is right around the corner and I was thinking back the other day to when I was a kid and how excited I was when the Christmas catalogs would arrive in the mail. You remember them, unless your a lot younger then I am. Sears and JCPennys were the big ones. Those things would arrive in November I believe and I would spend hours looking over each item on each page in the toy section towards the back, trying to decide if and what item deserved to be on my Christmas list. I would usually write that list up. Then erase items I had wrote and penciled in something else until the sheet of paper was a blur of erased pencil marks. I would tear that one up and start fresh. The finished paper had to look professional, I couldn't take a chance on turning in a sloppy Christmas list to Santa and then later on my parents. I put more effort into that wish list then I did most homework assignments at the time. I tried to have the right balance of things that weren't too big and extravagant and things I thought would be fun to have. But what if I were to write a Christmas list today? As a 44 year old male, what items would I want on that list. Here's a few things that I thought would be nice.

-A new tube of Preparation H that comes in a commemorative 2011 Christmas tin

-A new pair of 4.00X magnifying reading glasses so I could WRITE my Christmas list and then proof read it.

-A stylish new pair of orthopedic shoes that's designed to alleviate pain from falling arches.

-A Atari gaming system (that was a annual wish list item when I was a kid and I never got one and I'm still traumatized by that)

-A gift card from Hess for a months worth of free gas. I know, WAY to expensive to ask for but this is a "wish" list, right?

-A new President with conservative valves in 2012.

-One of those miracle dumb looking exercise gadgets that will change my 2 liter abs to six pack ones with just 5 minutes of use per day.

-A risque pair of new flannel pajama for nights when the mood is right with that special someone.

-A brand new Hybrid gas sipping car would be nice. It would certainly eliminate the need for the Hess gas card. Maybe I could jazz it up with some custom painted pinstripes, a air scoop on the hood and a great stereo system.

-One of those new fancy Blu-ray DVD players would be nice. First though I would have to make sure it would be compatible with my 18 year old 27 inch Magnavox.

-Speaking of DVD's, the complete second season of Hee Haw would be nice. That was the season Grandpa Jones moved to Kornfield County from neighboring Hillbilly Hollow and Junior Sample was introduced.

Of course, this is a early list. Items on here are subject to change as Christmas approaches. Keep checking back for my revised list.